They call it identity dissonance
This could well be a politically incorrect post, and maybe admitting to more than I would in real life. Oh what the heck! thats what anonymous blogs are for.
So, I am sitting in a hugely lavish boardroom, with a wonderful view over Amsterdam, with five big men in black suits, blond hair and blue eyes, and did I forget to mention, about a feet taller than I am. I am supposed to be an active participant in their, or rather our, very important conversation, but my mind insists on wandering away. What the hell am I doing here? I mean, really. If we were part of an IQ test question to pick out odd one out (remember those questions they used to have on every damn test), this would by far be the easiest question. And in walks in a bright young chick carrying coffee and sandwiches, probably from Surinam - and somehow, I feel an odd connection. I could probably relate to her more than my five wonderful colleagues. At least, we could talk about PMS or bitch about boys, or maybe the great shoe shop down the street.
Before this turns out to be a random rant, I will inject it with some high flying scientific terms (pardon me for my rather ill-written posts these days, at the end of the day, this is just about all I can manage, and I really wanna keep this blog alive. Hopefully I will try and balance out with better quality in weekends). Anyways, back to what I was saying - apparently, its not just me. The whole syndrome is called a professional identity disorder. Where you can’t associate yourself with your job. Now, I am pretty sure I don’t have it, coz this was a rather rare moment, but I totally get it - I totally get why it would be hard for some people to fit into some jobs. And isn’t that a real pity? We are not talking about any kind of discrimination or anything, just a deep subconscious clash of identities, a clash that occurs because somehow we decided some identities go better with some jobs.
In an interview with Carrie Yang Costello, the author of “Professional Identity Crisis: Race, Class, Gender, and Success at Professional Schools”Scott McLemee of Inside Higher Ed, writes this:
“One of the most durable metaphors used in making sense of the world treats social life as a kind of theatrical performance. Each of us is playing a part — more or less comfortably, more or less convincingly — while burdened, often enough, by the need to improvise “in character.”
“This idea is more than a Shakespearean conceit. It’s implicit in the sociological notion of “role,” for example. And it also helps make sense of what happens when people learn to play that type known as “the professional” — a much-sought social role, usually accompanied by substantial benefits in income, and even more in prestige.
Essentially, what it means is that, we all think fit a role, or a character. And when our job deviates a lot from that character, then we have what they call PID (I am not sure anyone else uses that acronym). Here’s a short extract from Amazon’s summary of the book:
The fact that women and people of color tend to underperform at professional schools is a source of controversy. Conservatives blame affirmative action, while liberals blame intentional discrimination. The extensive research reported in Professional Identity Crisis belies both conspiracy theories.
(..) the disproportionate success of white men can be explained by the fact that they are more likely to acquire appropriate professional identities swiftly, with little inner conflict. Students from less privileged backgrounds, however, suffered from “identity dissonance.”
“For example, Jasmine, a Filipino student from Los Angeles, explained, “In the legal culture you have to adopt a different way of being, a different vocabulary and way to carry yourself . . . That’s how I got this far. And when I go home, if I act the way I do here, they won’t get it. My cousins and my friends say, ‘You’re kind of whitewashed.’ And when I come back here I have to get back my law style.”
So, what do we do? Sit back and let they world pass by. Oh hell, no! lets fix this identity crisis, shall we? Where are all the women in this country? Can they come to work please? Lets change the corporate diversity equation a bit, and add a discussion on the latest Gucci bags on every agenda!
Thats the big rhetoric . As for tomorrow, I will exchange a friendly smile with Martha, our coffee lady.
Update: I didn’t mean this to be a feminist post. Because I think its a broader issue. If anyone has any views on how a man of color fares in a largely European corporation or how a white man feels, say in an Indian company, I am all ears.
Got nothing to say about this post specifically, for now, but thought I’ll put into words what I have seen in this blog and others too - The number of comments on blog posts is usually inversely proportional to the ‘weight’ of the topic being discussed, unless that topic is politics or religion.
Comment by Sig11 — September 7, 2006 @ 7:25 am
hmm..what does that mean here?
Comment by Sue — September 7, 2006 @ 7:31 am
One question .. how is not having common topics (like PMS & Gucci bags) to talk about a sign of professional identity crisis .. because isn’t it a factor of your work place composition (race / gender diversity etc) and not the role or job per se.
Comment by Pea — September 7, 2006 @ 3:51 pm
Its not about common topics - maybe I conveyed it wrongly.
For every role or profession, there are certain characteristics that have nothing to do with your ability to do the job, that are associated with it. For example, in the management teams of most Dutch companies you would find a typical old-school Dutch man - I know its a generalisation, but I am talking of the majority here. And women, are RARE. Much rarer than any other country, I think. And they, in general love to talk about similar topics, for example boats, of which a woman may not have anything to even identify with.
I am not talking of people excluding others, but in everyone’s minds including those of the women, when you think of a corporate boardroom, there is an image that springs to mind - and an image that you need to fit yourself to fit in if you find yourself there. When these two don’t match, there is professional dissonance. So for example, I talk extensively of boats when the situation demands, but honestly its not something I would do if I didn’t have to. And the “I” that talks of boats and the “I” that talks of books clashes rather badly. To me, its more an identity thing than just a composition issue - or maybe, its an identity issue that stems because of a distorted composition
Comment by Sue — September 7, 2006 @ 4:29 pm
Get the point. A conflict in that would be pretty tough to handle I suppose. . and overtype you can start representing that stereotype if you live the role long enough .. like the Filipino law student you mentioned.
Had read an article (cannot exactly remember the source) by an ex Ibanker talking of people working excessively in the industry..and he mentioned that some of them work really hard and live by stereotype because they feel they may have been hired by ‘mistake’ and are scared of getting exposed.
Comment by Pea — September 8, 2006 @ 6:16 pm
All I can say is that I often feel out of place in my workplace and wonder what the hell I and any colleagues have in common.
I don’t think your were politically incorrect at all btw.
Comment by 30in2005 — September 13, 2006 @ 11:19 am
According to me, the professional identity crisis described here is a subset of the individual’s identity crisis. With increasing globalisation, the middle class’ growing affluence and various other factors, it seems impossible in this day and age to belong to a place, totally assimilate into its historic fabric and then acquire an identity as a result.
Alright, I’ll cut the college talk. I completely identify with your posting; I’ve spend concentrations of time in 4 locations around the world. I thought I knew there was everything to know about myself when it came to being a cultural misfit, lo and behold! I now work in a marketing role for an MNC and interact with nationalities different to my own on a daily basis. For a while, I didn’t know how to relate to them let alone do business with them. What cultural platform do I place myself on before speaking to each individual? Their Culture? My Culture (what is it?)? or The culture of my geographical location?
Thankfully, before my head could turn into a 2 minute noodle packet, I realised that it’s slightly easier to adapt in the professional world compared to personal dealings. Your objectives are the same, your business backgrounds match, your experiences are equally diverse and all of you’ve got deadlines to meet - The only solution of course is a middle ground and communication rhythms that are to the point. Phew! Thank almighty for that one!
I’ve rambled on without syntax or design but it’s what I wanted to say.
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Comment by Aditya — October 4, 2006 @ 11:57 am
Hi Sue,
Haven’t seen you update your blog in a while. Hope it’s not one of those busy spells at work.
We are back in the US, and missing Brussels a lot. Will send an email later. Just wanted to say Hi. Happy Diwali!
Comment by Anjali — October 23, 2006 @ 1:06 pm
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Comment by Aparna Kar — November 13, 2007 @ 1:48 am